Monday, August 31, 2009

Brains Over Brawn!

Abby's busy eating her bone, so now it's my turn to post! You see, I can't believe Abby never thought to ask if there were any other schnauzers out there reading this. The internet is all about finding new dogs to talk to, but Abby doesn't think like that! She thinks it's all about chasing squirrels and finding new and exciting places to go potty (not that there's anything wrong with that). I guess that's why I'm the real brains of this operation regardless of what Abby says! Higher order thinking and all... Anyway, if you're out there, schnauzers, give a bark!

Uh-oh. Here comes Abby! Gotta run!

Thursday, August 27, 2009

Happy Birthday Mommy!

It's one day early, but Mommy and Daddy are going away for a few days, so this is our chance to wish our Mommy a Happy Birthday! Daddy says Mommy is 217 dog years old... That's old, but again, nothing that happened before we were born counts! Doggy licks for all!

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Obedience Training

Look what I found again in Mommy's closet! It's her boot from last summer! Ah, that brings back memories of one of my great triumphs: getting out of obedience training!

Now obviously I have to do a lot of obedience training... like every day. I swear no matter how much training I do with them, Mommy and Daddy continue to think they're in charge. They're hard ones to break, but I'm persistent. Eventually, I'll have them broken in just how I like them.

But last summer (2008), Mommy and Daddy had this idea that they'd put me (yes, ME! Can you BELIEVE it!) through obedience training! Oh, and Gracie too, but she needed it! Gracie was just a puppy then, so we had different classes, and Gracie started hers two weeks before I started mine. Well, after Gracie came back the first week, she said there were lots of treats, so I was excited to go. But the second week, she said she had to work and do tricks for the snacks. You know, things like sitting and staying. All I could think was that I had to get out of this! After all, I have one rule and one rule only: I'm in charge!

A few days later, I saw my opportunity! Mommy was trying to paint the bathroom (by the way, it's funny how Mommy and Daddy actually go to the bathroom inside... yuck!) So she was painting the bathroom and had leaned the ladder against the wall, so I just ran under the ladder and tipped it over onto Mommy's ankle! It ended up broken, and Daddy had to drive her to the doctor, but then she had no way to drive her car! So while Daddy was taking Gracie to her training, Mommy was unable to take me to mine! They canceled the class and still haven't remembered to sign me up again. I got out of it!

Man I am so awesome... and cute! Just remembering how smart I am makes me want to go chase a squirrel. See ya!

Saturday, August 22, 2009

My New Toy!

Last night Daddy returned from a business trip to a place he called "Alaska" wherever that is. The best part about Daddy coming home is that he brought me a new toy! This is me getting my new squirrel off the coffee table! It was grrrreat! You see, one of the most important things I do every day is chase all the squirrels off my property. Unfortunately, I never seem to catch them, but one day... In the meantime, this little stuffed squirrel is gonna pay!

When I was gone, Daddy even caught Gracie eyeing my squirrel, and then before long she made a grab for it! She should know better than to play with my stuff, so I'm going to beat her up later! As we know, I'm in charge, and I can not have Gracie ignoring my authority!

Today, Daddy pointed this strange contraption-thing in my face for what seemed like hours. I can't figure it out; it doesn't smell quite right. Daddy is strange sometimes.

After that was done, Gracie helped Daddy unpack from his trip. As there was no food or poop in the suitcase, she quickly lost interest.

Aunt Diva's also come over to stay for a month. As you can see, we all were helping, just not as much as Gracie.

Other than that, the day was full of pooping, eating, and cuddling with Daddy and Mommy. Time to go eat my squirrel again!

Monday, August 10, 2009

Hello World!

OK, I've studied Daddy doing this for some time, so I think I have the hang of it. Now it's my turn... only typing with paws is hard, but I eventually get it right. Now what do I want to say?Just a second --

Oh, I thought I heard someone in the kitchen. Dinner time's not for two hours, eleven minutes, and thirty-two seconds, but you never know. Sometimes, they go the snack jar, so if I have to bolt suddenly... Now where was I?

Oh, yes. What to say? First, I should probably introduce everyone. I'm Abby, and I'm the leader of this house. Some people call it ruler, queen, alpha-dog. Whatever you want to say, the bottom line is I'm in charge. Mommy and Daddy think they're in charge - and sometimes it suits me to let them think that - but in the end it's all me. I'm two and a half years old, black, and super cute.

Next is my little sister, Gracie. She's only one and a half years old, and people say she's "salt and pepper." It's just easier to say she's gray. I like to beat her up and steal her bones, toys, socks, and anything else that interests her. Of course, if anyone else beats her up, they're going to have problems with me! No one gives my little sister grief but ME! Got it?

Finally, there's Aunt Diva. She comes to stay with us sometimes. I don't know how old she is; she's older than I am, and we all know that nothing that happened before I was born matters. She's black and white and is the funniest looking schnauzer I've ever seen. Anyway, when she's here, nothing changes. I'm still in charge!

OK, I have to go patrol my domain now and make sure no one's acting up. Later!